After a breakup you might feel like you have more time on your hands, your ex is no longer around filling in your day. It can be a real adjustment but it also a chance for you to be selfish – there are many wonderful ways to keep busy. I heard a lot of different suggestions on how to keep busy after breaking up from the women I interviewed this year, so I thought it would be a good chance to put them all in one place.
- Volunteer at a group that interests you
- Read trashy novels
- Stash away all pictures of your ex
- Start a new hobby
- Plan an overseas holiday – even if it is for next year, start researching now
- Attend a fun class
- Go to a career counselor to work out where you are going with your career
- Volunteer at your kids’ school activities
- Watch a whole TV series on DVD
- Plan a Wallowfest
- Find some new recipes and master them
- Hold a freedom dinner party – invite your friends around to try your amazing cooking
- Look into taking a class that will advance your career
- Start a herb or vegetable garden
- Start writing a blog
- Start researching and writing that book you always wanted to write
- Organize your closet – pull out everything, sell the clothes that aren’t ‘you’ anymore and enjoy the extra space (especially as his clothes are gone)
- Organize your iTunes library, create some new playlists
- Create a budget
- Start or join a book club
- Clean out your bathroom cupboard and your makeup drawer
- Do an adventure activity that is out of your comfort zone, like whitewater rafting
- Write down your goals for the next year
- Work out a plan of action to make your goals happen
- Buy a vibrator!
- Write some erotica
- Start a new sport
- Try a new exercise program, even if it is only walking regularly
- Make a picture book for your kids
- Talk things through with a therapist
- Join an online forum of one of your interests
- Find some blogs and websites you enjoy and follow them
- Redecorate your bedroom
- Go for a massage – you could try your local massage school for a discounted rate
- Search for the perfect piece of freedom jewelry
- Take a minibreak with your kids or friends and get away for the weekend
- Get busy with art or craft projects you enjoy
- Write a list of all the things you are thankful for
- Write a list of all the things you want to be thankful for this time next year
- Read that classic novel you’ve never had time for
- Get some of your favorite photos printed out and framed
- Start taking your camera around with you, and take more shots
- Make a time with a person who has your dream job to ask how they got there
- Make a time with a person who has your dream relationship to ask how they got there
- Pull out your sewing machine and start on a sewing project
- Get out the tools and start a home handywoman project
- Say ‘yes’ when someone asks you to something you wouldn’t normally go to
- Have a crush on that cute guy that served you at the restaurant
- Sleep in the middle of the bed – because you can!
- Write your breakup tips or story to Sarah – I’d love to hear from you.
And of course you also need time out – time out to become accustomed to your newly single status, time out to grieve your past relationship, time out to adjust to your new life after breaking up. Don’t get overly busy otherwise the grieving process will take longer. Make sure you have time to yourself.
I’ve also written about this in a related article on hubpages, with more detailed examples of women’s stories of what they did to keep busy after a breakup. If you’d like to add to your sad songs list on your iPod, check out my DJ Downer post
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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
all this is not working like only 9 of the 50 dont sound like a complete waste of time but thats just me but i believe u can help me still
most sound like a waste of time….. i want something constructive and self improving so i can feel empowered and superior and succesful.